The Human Santapede

Product Information

What it is, is smutty, violent, disgusting, full of bad language, even worse sex, characters with no redeeming qualities and more bad jokes than you can shake a stick covered in poo at.

Etsy’s 100% renewable electricity commitment includes the electricity used by the data centres that host Etsy. Adam Millard is the author of twenty novels, twelve novellas, and more than two hundred short stories, which can be found in various collections and anthologies. Centuries of forced labor, no wages, no vacations, mandatory eggnog, no credit, nonstop carols … the constant threat of being replaced by cheaper foreign elves and sent to work in the human realm as a fantasy movie extra … the only perk is in the buxom form of Mrs. Santa himself is a grumpy old lush, who spends his days lording it over his 'staff' and being completely oblivious to the infidelities of his ex-stripper wife, Jessica. New with tags: A brand-new, unused, unworn and undamaged item in the original packaging (such as the .To calculate the overall star rating and percentage breakdown by star, we don’t use a simple average. at least, that was the plan, but now his elves have started going missing, kidnapped by some insidious figure in a black cloak, and despite the magic swirling about the place, the toys aren't going to put themselves together. Claus, whose considerable needs may go neglected by her hubby, but who’s got a special fondness for elves. It’s a regular fit on guys, and a loose, slightly oversized fit on girls, so we recommend sizing down if you are between sizes. Most purchases from business sellers are protected by the Consumer Contract Regulations 2013 which give you the right to cancel the purchase within 14 days after the day you receive the item.

Every now and again I’d catch a glimpse of a fellow passenger chuckling or sly smirk from across the carriage as they noticed the cover of the paperback I was shamelessly reading. Santa Claus is coming to town…at least, that was the plan, but now his elves have started going missing, kidnapped by some insidious figure in a black cloak, and despite the magic swirling about the place, the toys aren’t going to put themselves together. I doubt most people enjoying this sort of humor, and some of the jokes weren't really my thing or overused, which is why I knocked off a star, seeing as the book wasn't incredibly long to begin with, but it still made for an enjoyable experience, and I may even read it again.

Personalised advertising may be considered a “sale” or “sharing” of information under California and other state privacy laws, and you may have a right to opt out. So here it is, Merry Christmas, / Everybody’s arse to face, / Shitting down each other’s throats, / A yuletide disgrace. If it were renamed I may have not picked it up; had it lived up to the first two films more than the third I'd have not been able to put it down.

I laughed and enjoyed this silly, weird (In)Human Santapede parade because I have the sense of humor of a five year old. This evil figure is sewing the elves arse to mouth, with the ultimate aim of kidnapping Santa himself and making him the figurehead of this shuffling man-made meat train.But it had just the right amount of dark humor mixed with horror elements sprinkled with pop culture insults. You can change your choices at any time by visiting Cookie preferences, as described in the Cookie notice.